Me: The one about the Johnson thing?
Husband: Yeah, funny right?
Lee: Johnson?
Me: It's a boat motor, but also refers to a man's man part.
Husband: It's a boat motor.
Lee: Oh, that's funny! Start my Johnson! Drive my Johnson!
Jack: Grind my Johnson! Take my Johnson for a walk!
Husband: Prime my Johnson, choke my Johnson.
Me: The guy in the video Daddy is referring to is singing about his boat motor.
Jack: Is there a girl in the video?
Me: Yes, that's what makes it so funny.
Lee: I gotta Johnson!
Husband: Alright, that's enough talk about Johnsons.
Jack: (In a deep creepy voice that sort of sounds like Jim Carey as an announcer) Well, it's better than THE VAGINA! The ancient vagina...
Husband: Alright, this is getting a little out of hand...
Me: (Trying not to giggle) Ok, this isn't really...
Jack: (Still in creepy announcer voice) The ancient Vagina is prehistoric and...
Me: (Now giggling) Prehistoric?
Husband: Well, they have been around for a long time.
Lee: It's a prehistoric dinosaur vagina.
Me: Okay, okay, let's settle down.
Jack: Well, vagina is better than saying pussy. You said we can't say pussy.
Me: You're saying it, you need to stop now.
Husband: Okay guys, that's enough.
Lee: Yeah Jack.
Jack: Can I say the B word?
Husband: No, what's wrong with you?
Jack: It's in the dictionary. You said we can say words that are in the dictionary.
Lee: Ass is in the dictionary.
Husband: This conversation is not helping our digestion.
Jack: What if you're digesting an Ass?
Husband: (To me) Can you believe these kids?
Me: I need a drink.
4 comments:
Oh my....only a matter of time before we'll be dealing with the same level of ridiculousness. Can I pre-drink?
Sadly, it really IS the only way...spanking them doesn't work any more, they are as tall as I am and their booties are so hard that I always hurt my hand when I try it. My only consolation is that prior to this conversation, Jack said the most lovely pre-dinner prayer...sigh.
Aha! Finally an advantage in having just daughters. This conversation would never happen at my dinner table - at least I think it wouldn't...
Great readinng your post
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